A good friend mentioned to me today, that she misses my posts. (If you haven’t noticed, I am in a holding pattern for posting any more chapters for the book.) After I took my bow of flattery, I wondered if not posting would affect the other readers on this blog. She convinced me that it would, so you can blame her for what I plan to do next. Because quite honestly, I miss posting. I miss telling stories about my family and the amazing journey we have been on. I miss reactions and feedback to some funny and some heartbreaking episodes in the book. So, as I am currently editing and adding sections to the book, I will continue to post even if it is out of order of the story or those posts may not make it in the book. I will continue to put messages out there that I hope speak to you. Here goes the first “thoughts for the day”. (Don’t worry, I won’t call it’ thoughts for the day’, that sounds too much like a daily affirmation calendar, I will come up with a witty title.) So make today’s: “The Magic Pill”.
Ryan’s 1st grade teacher, gave me a book called “Rules”. The book is about a teenager girl who has an autistic brother. “Ms. Abrams”, the lovely lady who took such an interest in Ryan, thought it fitting for Jenna to read the book also. Jenna was in fifth grade at the time and started reading the book first and quickly had a question for me.
“Mom, in the book, the girl wishes for a magic pill to take away her brother’s autism…do you wish we could give Ryan a pill like that?” She asked me seriously.
I had to take long breath in and find a suitable answer. If I’m being honest, the immediate answer is Yes! Of course! What mother wouldn’t want her baby to be “normal” again? But as I quickly reflected on Ryan and all that he had been through and all that I had grown to appreciate about him, from learning to speak to seeing his crooked smile more often, I knew my answer.
“No, Jenna, I would not want a pill to take away his autism.” I looked at her to make my point. She had a surprised look at my answer. I spoke slowly so she could really hear what I was about to say, and to make sure I said it right.
“This is the way Ryan is, and without his autism, I don’t know who he would be…I wouldn’t’ recognize him…I like him the way he is. He’s just Ryan.” I crossed my arms as a final statement that I meant it.
She sunk into her chair, as if my answer were too heavy for her.
“Oh.” was all she could reply.
I waited a few beats to see if she had anything more to add. I could see her eyebrows knitted together as she thought. It didn’t take her too long and that only proves the amazing kid that she is.
“Me too, Mom, I like Ry the way he is.” She smiled sweetly and I knew she meant it too.